eeek!

today was a day of missing buses/trains and other horrid adventures. haha. went to the city today for an interview for a casual clerical post at a firm in the city. my first time actually entering a firm for personal reasons. the place was pretty professional, not posh, but it makes your hair stand knowing that you're in a firm with real lawyers haha.(John Grisham thoughts spiralling) i dont know about you, but there's this certain air about lawyers i cant exactly pinpoint. perhaps it's the practice of seeming confident even when you're lying through your teeth.

anyway, one of the partners and his secretary interviewed me. i actually love interviews, just that this whole the-lawyer-and-his-air thing tied my tongue a little. haha. but it was okay, i hope i can get the experience working on a cool 26th floor with rotating doors haha. -_-

roaming about, i decided to drop by taylors to see my biology teacher mrs. richards. gave her a very pink card. she's still as cute as ever. (unfortunately, some people think she's a little err "retarded" behaving erhumph) she greeted me with a very wet (and i hate- twice somemore!) kiss and told me not to return it cos she had some rash thing.

"ohhh! -brightens up- it's an auto-immune disease, but it's not contagious..histamine..-rambles-.."
"oh my gosh, mrs. richards! -_-"

she was the one who believed in me, who said i could do it. she managed to reverse the semi-horrid effects bio teachers had on me in j1 :) we were chatting briefly, and she knew that i didnt do as well as i had expected and was still inherently sore about it. she reads me haha. so, she just encouraged me to do my best, and to know that i'll look back not regretting it.

which reminded me of one of the biggest past irks- how a few med students would, in my personal belief, come up with erroneous reasons of why they're doing what they're doing. and laugh it off. thinking about it, my neurones shouldnt be firing them with charges of disgust. instead, i should be encouraging them to live it out.

i'm the pot calling the kettle black i suppose. alot, and i mean alot, of people have asked me why sc/law. i try to construe some intelligent response, which usually turns out as a clear half-baked attempt at cutting air. inside, the answer is "i dont know. just cos law sounds good." -and from there, the cycle of vicious wannabes judging others goes on.

i admire the people who love what they're doing. truth is, the word was envy. i'd never thought this stage would ever rise. good news is, God's put a stop to that. He brought me back to the book of "Secrets of the Vine" by Bruce Wilkinson. This book dates back to megalife cgl days. What it means to be pruned by God. not discplined, but tested. Let me just share the prime points:

God's shears will be at work:
1) The people you love most. (or perhaps, think you love most)
2) Your right to know why God does what He does
3) Your love for money and possessions
4) The sources of your significance.

As Paul, a man who had been pruned until there was nothing left of his self-life, wrote in Philippians 3:7-8 "..for whom (Christ Jesus) I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ."

Be encouraged, know that you're not alone in this, but trust God with everything you have. Seasons dont last for eternity, and when they end, we wouldn't want to look back, amen? :)
___________________

met up with shuk thereafter! so happy to see her..just catching up with her:) thanks dear for just listening. you unknowingly reminded me not to rush into uncertainty, somehow. hahaha. please quit your cleaning job asap hehe :) i hope you get to see jungle boy soon and that prof chng will not turn him gay haha. :) looking forward to staying over and vic market shopping haha! n free gold coast accomodation, though tt's pretty uncertain now haha.:) -hugs. all the best for the exams, you can do it!:) -puts specs on and assumes normal "auntie" air-

and lee shun man, if you're reading this, know that i miss you so stop complaining that i dont reply your emails! :) have fun at some army event thing -winks- hehehe. -evil laughter- big hugs:)

girlfriends

we had a pj party at sherlynn's house for the ocf girls that day..and they were talking about having good girlfriends.

boy, am i really appreciative of my good girl frens. they're the ones who've brought me through so much! :) but of course, my good guy friends turn out well too:)

it was then i realised that i dont really have a best girl friend here. or even a best friend for that matter. it's sad, but true. -_- maybe i should try to open up more. somehow i dont like sharing what im going through..maybe jie's right. i dont like to feel vunerable.

BUT. im going to meet tong shuk in tomorrow..so it's going to be okay:)

fcy come back from cambodia soon. i miss you. =(

the two who've accepted me as i am. :)

HAPPY 19TH WHINEY WAYNE

mr. whiney: thank you for being the complain king in mich and mine's lives. :) thank you for sending me all the way to the airport last nov, drinking coffee and watching planes zoom away haha. thank you for answering when cheryl and i called to destress on our dandenong magistrates court irritation. thank you for sending us around and playing nice hillsongs united music;) more imptly,

thank you for giving to the Lord every week. thank you for being faithful and always there to help. :)

since you're now officially older than me haha..may God bless you with so much more. expect much, love much and gain much, okay? :) and im glad your week was "not too bad" today instead of the usual "same lor -bored face"

so i cant wait to queue up for melb's krispy kremes, and im proposing a serious krispy kreme party at new Sia's home. (party hats, balloons and all. mich, 22nd june still here?) plus horse riding at great ocean road if energy permits:)

you rock wayne, and im sure mich and the rest at 1045 and casey agree with me.:)

love, char



Christmas at taka 05:) the very apt photo of 3 beautiful characters;)

from anne's blog

And there’s the Beauty we seek in the joy of companionship. In retrospect , friendship has engaged me in a fraternity bond between me and my inseparable crowd. I’ve learnt that a smile, a handshake , or even a kind word , can spawn a friendship. I learned to live in great fulfillment of appreciating those who love me for who I am. Friends who where there when I needed a ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, and them being the stage where I dance, sing, act, and speak so freely. How I loved us gathering together for juice gossips and giggled all night long. How we used to celebrate the jubilee of our friendship with slumber parties and filling ourselves up with nasty amount of chocolates and titbits.

Ah , the joy of giving and sharing , personal endeavours that we had promised to attain, and of boys we secretly wished to date……..
And as now I still recall my countenances of those youthful years, so warm, so bright, so full of life ! We laughed, until we had to cry. We gave love, down to our last goodbyes , but this cloak of grief won’t rest on me forever.

Adieu to the beautiful seasons that waltzed by our grey, but vivid past. I love my friends, who have always been , and always will be, a part of me.
_________________________

isnt her essay the most beautiful and touching thing? :)

close friends would know how fast i can move on, how fast i can adapt to new environments. nonetheless, it's more good than bad, as life is too short to remember the hurts and pain of the past, preferring us to be champions in giving them up. we should move on truly happy, yet never forgetting the unspoken notions of our hearts- the joys of the past.

"p/s: To Chewie, get A's okay!! Fo reasons , one being that you're a born intellect from an intellectual country , two you're consistent, and besides that, I have faith in all you do, all the time. And it doesn't matter what the world knows abt. you or tries to , because you have proven your sincerest best to Him who is bigger and greater than this world. And also, thank you so much, to you , the "doctor" of my heart !! "

To the girl who truly understood my heart, thank you for believing in me. you're one of the few whom ive shared my dreams with, so thank you for being there, thank you for understanding. There are many future doctors in this world (unfortunately haha) but from my heart, you're one of the best ive seen.
_____________________________

sometimes the word "thank you" never reaches the people who once meant the world to you

to cry in front of a friend means more than sharing the trouble

Jesus asked Peter, "Do you love me?" If you do, feed my sheep.

Great men and women are those who serve others.

God, please grant me strength to carry on. Please tell me it's all going to be okay. Thank You Lord. :)

Quote from mau ren:

"I always had a fear of the day when I will be meeting God and it would be a truly disastrous time when God says “I don’t know u”. What a nightmare it would be then.

It would be a bummer if God was real and that we missed out.

What have I done to deserve to go to Heaven? I have believed in Jesus Christ as the ultimate saviour for man and that alone deserve me to go to Heaven.

I do not wanna have an ordinary life. I wanna have a life that would impact others and bring ppl to God. I wanna share the love that God has given me. I will rise up for others and not become stale in my spiritual walk. I don’t wanna be rabbits who stop when the spotlight is shine upon them and before they know it, there’s a bullet through their ears. I wanna move forward so that I don’t fall behind. I wouldn’t let others try to bring me down with false and lies but I will be strong and reply with the truth.

I’m ready Lord. Bring it on~!"

_______________________________________________________________________________

Amen. It's encouraging to hear depth from your fellow bros and sisters-in-Christ. Ultimately, after all's been said and done, God is the centre of it all. :)

Sorry, since im rushing for time:

today anne called from msia! she made me happy! she's coming in july! that'll make me happier! i miss her! haha. :)

i found out that my korean bio lab mate na yeon is a christian too! she's the one from taylors mufy..hope to bring her to ocf:)

praise God for moving in Casey worship last sun! when we pray with a sincere and contrite spirit, God answers:)

i want my bf deb to come soon!

i wanna see shuk soon before she leaves for sg:)

my cell group is the funniest! we had so much fun playing games during cell..haha yellow zebra? and jie, june and emalyne and i played another chinese game while waiting for eileen to fetch us. super funny. laughed during supper until got too much air in tummy. haha

i currently enjoy studying:) exams are round the corner. shall take it a step at the time:)

i sound like a little kid. -_- hahaha who cares

shuk: yeah i noe i havent replied ur mails!..that's why i msged you tt day too!!:) ya..seems like yesterday we talked to each other when you first arrived..:) im glad ure settling in dear:) jia you too!!

lien: come to study here soon okay!? -pokes, tickles, pinches. haha. if i rem correctly, your pinches are THE hardest..:)

yon: hey yeah..are you gng back to kch? must meet up after exams okay? hope everything's okay..and tt JC is going along fine..:) take care lots and God'll sustain you okay?:)

nat: naaaaaaaaaattttt what happened to ur blog? haha..yeah i dont think army guys will appreciate whining (as if nick ever did)..i promise one whole minute of whining with you when i come back okay? -hugsyou:)

grace: HELLOOOO!:) -waves

hy: yar lar..that girl..tsktsk. must be busy bathing the ugly scrappy at home only..

deb: haha means ur exam finishes on 18th nov? haha i think mine should be around there too..but you would wanna celebrate ur bday in sg rite? =(( means u'll miss mine and i'll miss yours=( come here soon! good you went to church! haha..and yar warcraft is just amazingly incomprehensible to us girls haha..:))

e-mails: sorry i havent been replying mails. promise long ones after 16th june. :) im only updating my blog so that i can share with my close ones on my life at one shot. :)

To the love of my life

To be sung in the tune of "you're my best little girl", as my mummy always sings to us.:)

"To the best mum on earth,
You're my pride and my joy,
And i always pray the best, for you..

You're my tower of strength,
and i hold you so dear,
You're the best i could ever have. "

Thank you mummy for always being there for me. I know that blood is always thicker than water, as to a mother's love is purer than gold. You always forgave me even when i broke your heart- i never will again, because you mean more to me than any other person in this world.

You're my mother, my role model, my friend, my confidant, my hope, my joy. A woman of God who has given her life to raise me up to who i am today. Even if noone else in this world loves me, it's okay. because i know you, daddy and jiejie will always love each other till we meet again in heaven.

You've always showered me with hugs, kisses and sacrifices- i never knew what it meant to be unloved. You've brought me into this world with a strong family, a family that will never ever break. A family that has seen me through my good and my bad. A family who has accepted me for who i am. And because of that, ive never lacked anything.

God answers prayers. I love you Mdm. Chiam Hui Min, because you would stop the world for me, and i would do the same for you. Happy Mother's Day.

You are worthy, O Lord, of all honour
You are worthy to receive all praise
In Your presence I live, and with all I have to give

I will worship You, honour You, glorify, Your Holy name.

Alot of times while running the race, we are tired and weary beings. but let's be reminded of the fact that God is worthy of all our honour and praise, inconsequential of how we're feeling today. Honour and praise to Him is not counted as how much we do for Him, how much we give to others- our lives, our hearts, our time and energy. but it is, I believe, measured by how we spend our time with Him in the secret place. time alone with God; how can I survive without Your love, Your touch. my home is heaven, one day Lord I will live.

I know You hear my every cry, and petition that I make. I wanna stand my days in Your presence Lord..in the house of God is where I find my peace.
__________________________________

deb: haha no more fcbc? and what's so fun about warcraft rite..haha but that's martians for you. haha. how come ure going to stay in hostel? i think it's better..less travel time and more study time haha..hey dear. alot of times we may feel like we cant be bothered with "church" anymore..but see beyond that okay? see our purpose on earth, and it's all about Jesus once more. rediscover your first love once again. dont give up..it's good to be grounded in His word and with His people. :) haha and im equally sotong with tech..one day when i see you online then you can send pics to me lar!!

haha yes i love all of my frens..just so happened that everyone who tagged is a really great friend of mine..although when i was typing, it did seem a little fake, but i wont simply say that to people im not close to..haha:) but i think i love deb. maybe? maybe not?? hahaha. can you come here soon??!?! :)

jia: fcy!! i miss you:) tts an understatement(rem what this word means?) heh. i will reply your mail soon okay? tonight after i finish my work. big hugs. :)))

jasin: hey dear! havent heard from you in a long while:) hope ure doing fine and still cheerful as ever! take care okaaay..and ive been doing aerobics instead of normal sports hahaha (dont laugh) :) will try to play badminton with my sis soon la..:) miss you too:))

nat: naaaat!! can you tell me ur blog add again!? haha. i miss you dear WHINING GIRL. :) take care lil sis, and we should whine together soon:) -giggles. (haha ewww so girl girl)

shun: dear!!:) haha..sorry larrr.=( i hope ure having lotsa fun too! i missed alicia's bday celebration=( will reply u soon, and update ur dead blog if u havent!!:) love u!! :)

grace: grace ong LALA! how are you??? i miss you too!! must catch up with you soon okay..somehow? by msn or sth..haha:) take care dear:)))

debo and hy: eh both of you only communicate to each other on my blog, so rude arh. hahaha. deb, why dont wanna go church huh? ur fcbc fren is it haha. and show us pics of ur err..itchy trip haha. :) and hy! it's been longer ages since you saw meeeee=( -jealous. haha. love you both loads. :)

my inspiration-s


mich, chris, kelv.. with yulie/baby girlie, and chris acting as baby:)

my dearest mich and i:) the gang. wes chris pauline(simon's gf) simon sweet mich..now now noone told me it meant to be a weird face photo!!

yumcha-ing! and mich with her chicken feet fetish-NOT!! (kenna forced)

the clayton girls at camp. and the boys.

i really thank the Lord for wonderful godly people He has surrounded me with. to press on in Him, to run the race.

"forgetting what lies behind, i press on towards the goal Christ has set for me."

a wonderful bunch of people at 1045 (a rather cool name ironically!) and at Casey. they're a dedicated group of servants of the Lord- never complaining, humble and unassuming. beautiful people after God's own heart, even though things sometimes move slowly.

it was Casey's official opening last sunday. about 113 adults:) woohoo. praise God for their support. bel sherlynn and daryl came too:) sorry for the lack of different pics from mich's blog (erhumph) fiona hasnt sent me the pics (double erhumph) :) haha.

some days i just step back and go. wow. 1045 has grown from a dwindling few 20 pp to a steady 50/60 each week. and the worship team sounds better every time i visit.

so what i can say, what i do..but give glory to You.

and Casey? it's amazing how you're involved in pioneering a church. would never ever have thought of doing that in aust. let's say in indo maybe? but aust?? with pak ken, kian wei, fiona, and 3/4 of my family? and other riverlifers and dedicated others? -smiles.

ive finally realised why God doesnt reveal His will to me, or to alot of others i know. sometimes you think it's unfair that others have already been given a vision/prophecy of their calling. it's so good to know what lies ahead. rampant horoscopes and fortune telling abundant. but i believe that it's because 1) God's plans for you are BEYOND what you could ever imagine. you wouldnt dare to dream/live it if you knew. 2) Trust, have faith, press on.

God said, "dare to dream". and i answered, "i will".

clayton ocf has many "quality" pp whom i really do look up to. im always encouraged every cell group by different individuals in my cell. and by my leaders who lead by example. im currently in the july winter camp committee..im inspired and excited by what God is going to do in the short 3 days. :)

Man looks at the appearance but God looks at the heart. if you love God, love what He loves and hate what He hates.

when you feel as if you have no reason to thank God for anything, look at what could have been.
__________________________

so i visited 1045 last sunday! and we yum cha-ed after that. so yummy! haha..it's good to go with people like kelv who zoom in and know what to order. had cow's stomach and intestine, chicken feet (dont mind mich) and oh so super yummy egg tart where you can just slurp the egg out (reminder*: never again to eat the city's supposedly wonderful egg tart, of which i used to be an ardent fan) and nice ice cream balls. waaaaaahhhhh.

and then dinner after Casey service was..gosh. i had a mountain of food!!! i made ice cream cake! haha..okay lar. i stuffed layers of sponge cake i bought in between..but i made the oreo base and choc toppings and deco! daryl said it was yummy. :) haha. although it all melted since there was no freezer. -_-

and my mum recently emailed saying Cheryl You's gettin married 3 days from now. gosh! i still remember how i admired (and still admire) her when she was in jc. time flies. haha, but of course. i really hope everything goes well and im sure the whole church will be behind her:)

okay!! it's a really tight schedule from now till exams finish on june16, then ive got hols till july 14. im planning to do lotsa exciting stuff in the hols!:) hopefully they will actually come to past. so yeah, pls forgive me for email time laggin.

"i live for all my days, to put a smile:) on Your face. And when we finally meet, it'll be for eternity."

the beautiful sunrise at the beach. you can spot someone praying:) shin han, his friend and i:)

ben and yon. staying up to watch sunrise:) sue-leen and i, my ex-coleader at winter camp!

my camp group!!! with kafaii at the back! emmy and i!:) managed to share with her=)

the horrid parkvillians haha.yon, lee, marianne, melissa. my new friend fr parkville- chew hui!the crazy msian..

vic, laura, mau ren and 2 others..! sau marianne and half of me..driving up:)

me with the ribbon of the choc bunny given by mau ren:) yon and me!

mei sun and i!! miss that girl..:)

twas was a great camp:) took lotsa other photos esp with parkvillians, but it's not aesthetically wise to post them:) haha